Motivation is a key requirement when we want to change any aspect of our life for the better.
Whether we want to lose weight, have a new career, improve our relationship, make new friends, study or a whole host of other things. Continuously feeling motivated is key.
This is fairly easy when we take the first step, because it’s exciting. Most especially if we’ve set a really compelling goal and broken it down well, so it’s aligned.
But over time, that feeling can wane, particularly if we tend to be externally motivated.
The things is; no new outcome is accomplished without some effort and challenge. And there will be times when it’s easier to do something else instead.
Have to say writing is one of the things that challenge me a lot. I wasn’t very good at it during my high school years and I would mostly get a C in English literature.
First of all, it was because I wasn’t inspired by the content I had to write about. And secondly I just didn’t know where to start.
But let’s take a look at the inspiration part, because this is the main part of the problem.
Expert in human behaviour, Dr John Demartini says that true motivation is internal and comes in the form of inspiration. This is triggered when we fulfil our values. He also says that kids with learning difficulties only find it challenging because they’re not inspired to learn the content they are given. This totally rings true with my schooling experience.
But when the content is changed to align with what the child is interested in and values, learning becomes so much easier.
Let’s circle back to look at my issue with writing. I now write heaps of content. From articles, blogs and presentations through to aiming to write a book. I’m actually pretty good at writing now because the content aligns with my values and what I’m interested in.
Yet, I still do have times when it’s difficult to find the motivation to write. At times like this I have a few different strategies I use to inspire me:
Aligning your interests allows you to find motivation when it’s waning
It sounds simple. But how often do we try to push ourselves to do something that doesn’t interest us.
Just today I was trying to write this article about a different topic. I would still like to write it, but it wasn’t relative to my interest in this moment. Once I decided to write the article about the topic of “motivation” my fingers began tapping away. This is because it was something I want in this moment and so had become a strong interest for me.
Applying this to other goals you might have. If you want to improve your relationship by having date night once each week. It’s important that you do something that you are both interested in or take it in turns.
When the activity fulfils your values you feel inspired to do it
In the moments we feel most fulfilled we can be fairly sure we are experiencing something that meets our values. And of course we all want to feel fulfilled and this provides the motivation to partake in that activity or situation.
Naturally we need to have a large amount of clarity around our values, to make conscious choices that inspire us. Or to change our choices so they light us up.
Let’s have a look at how this applies to a health goal for instance. If health is a value it’s fairly easy to stay motivated to exercise. Unless of course you’re planning to do types of exercise that don’t interest you or you don’t enjoy.
But let’s say all this is aligned and you still lack that important motivating force. It’s probably because there are other values that aren’t aligned. As soon as you line up any values that are in conflict it changes.
I once had a client who valued health. In fact she had a business that aligned with that value. But she found it difficult to commit to walking each day. She loved walking but still kept finding reasons not to do it. As soon as she got clarity around another value of connection, she was able to change things so she felt more motivated. This meant she invited her friend to come along each day. Through this she was able to catch up with her friend too and she stopped getting in her own way.
When all else fails future pacing gets you moving big time
If I’m still finding it difficult to write I bring out the big guns. For me it’s about showing myself what might happen if I don’t do it.
But to do this well you need to be really clear on your big reason why for doing something. And needless to say, your why is aligned with your values. Once you know this it’s fairly easy to feel motivated by looking at the consequences of not following through.
For example if you exercise because you want to stay healthy. Then think about what might happen if you don’t do it. You can go as deep as you like to find all the problems that could arise. Keep looking at consequence after consequence until you feel that drive ignite.
In the case of improving your relationship, explore what might happen over time if you don’t make an effort for date night.
Internal motivation is far more superior to the external source
If we can learn how to cultivate internal motivation then we can’t go wrong. This is because it gives us far more control over our impulses even when they wane.
By setting goals that inspire you and then making sure everything is aligned, you will always have a strategy that can get you moving. Just one hour ago I was finding it hard to get started and now my article is complete. I used two of these strategies to get going. Can you guess which two I used?
Certainly there can be other internal blocks that get in the way and if you’re still having a problem staying motivated this needs to be addressed. Working with an experienced coach can help you shift anything that’s working against you. To see if coaching feels right for you, book your initial connect call HERE.